You may wonder, isn’t self-love selfish and our response to that is: absolutely not! We have found in our work and our human world, innumerable wounded souls walking around with self-hate and judgement.
Valentine’s Day has come to be known as a celebration of romantic love. Flowers, hearts, chocolates, stuffed animals, dinners, etc. have become a hallmark of this day. Yet, to many who do not have a love interest, have lost their loved one, or are in a loveless partnership, this day holds no meaning whatsoever. For those who are in a loving relationship, for sure this is one out of many days and ways in which they celebrate love. But there is no denying that there is an expectation to show up with material gifts, and sometimes those still leave one feeling empty.
So may we suggest that this day be given a different or an added meaning…as a day to celebrate self-love?
You may wonder, isn’t self-love selfish and our response to that is: absolutely not! We have found in our work and our human world, innumerable wounded souls walking around with self-hate and judgement. It pains us to see that we haven’t been taught how to love ourselves. To be very honest, one can’t give from an empty place within oneself. If our hearts aren’t filled with love for ourselves, we aren’t really able to love another with joy and abundance.
So how does one practice self-love?
By acknowledging that we all have parts of us we do not like or love. And instead of suppressing or ignoring those parts, pouring love into them so they feel accepted. And then allowing for the magic to happen. All those parts of us that we have hated, are only showing what in us is needing more love and attention. When given room, those parts stop acting up.
Here’s another way to look at this: we have all been created by the same Divine creator. Assuming that this Divine creator is the absolute and the most loving power that exists, why then do we question it’s artistry and perfection? Know that we are fine, just as we have been created. Self-acceptance leads to self-love. And self-love leads to accepting others as divine creations too.
Fact is, soul level, everyone is beautiful and it is the human cloak that has varying shades of what we consider ugly. But this human cloak is temporary and those things we consider ugly exist only to point us to where our inner work lies. But this work isn’t possible without first loving ourselves. Imagine if the doctor or healer attending to us is super rude and harsh…are they going to heal us or wound us further?
So may we request that this Valentine’s day, make it a day of self-love. And once you are filled with love, you will be able to express it authentically and share it with your partner and loved ones. Know that LOVE is the answer to every question. LOVE is the solution to every problem. LOVE is the foundation and fabric of this universe. None of us would exist if Mother Earth didn’t love us, and nurture and nourish us with her bounties. If alone, make it a day to have fun with yourself. Buy yourself flowers and treats, spend the day being in nature feeling her love, take yourself out on a date, or spend it serving those who need love and support.
Make it a day to love yourself more, not less.
Happy Valentine’s Day!
© Dr. Smita Garg, 2020
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